Loners are usually the kind of people who embrace solitude with open arms. They refrain from seeking meaningless human connection and sometimes they go lengths to avoid human interaction. However, there are layers to a loner which can only be unravelled when you get to know them on a personal level.
The idea of seeing a loner as a mentally exhausted, unstable, delusional or depressed being is by far the most common presumption. Not everybody can gulp the thought of getting to know a person who genuinely loves their own company. And doesn’t want anybody to interfere with their inner peace, their ideal state of consciousness.
The fun side of loners:
Loners can be childish, goofy, witty and fun hanging around with only if they feel comfortable around you. But not everybody gets the opportunity to see their carefree-cuddly side. As loners are very picky about the kind of people they gel with. They take time to ponder on little things before they actually meet a person in real.
They not only choose their companions wisely but think deeply before investing their time on someone. Since letting a person in their life could mean a lot as it could either make or break their solitary retreat, where they dwell peacefully.
What does it mean when a loner pursues you or loves hanging with you:
However, when a loner finds someone who gives them enough space and alone time to be unapologetically themselves. They hold onto that person. Also, the perfect balance between the meet and miss makes the union special. Since they can indulge in their own world full of melodious silence.
This also gives them enough time for themselves and also to relish the warmth of a beautiful human connection. If a loner lets you in their life it clearly suggests that you are special to them. Because they only crave for meaningful connection and wasting time to fill the void isn’t their cup of tea. They would rather sit in their room and ponder deeply than chase humans for temporary bliss.
Why loners refrain from seeking social connections:
Even a bare minimal social interaction for someone who has been better off alone can be a self-inflicted harm. It can disrupt their daily course of actions, their thought process and can drain them mentally as well as emotionally. However, this only happens when they don’t feel the mutual love and respect in a union.
While for others socializing and connecting with people may be an activity they relish and use as an escape from the moribund life. But for loners, it means breaking the walls and erasing the boundaries that they’ve built over the years. So nobody can trespass it to destroy their inner peace.
This kind of introversion may either be naturally engraved in them or could be a preferred choice. As many social and personal factors can lead someone to embrace solitude to avoid the constant war that happens within.
Some loners feel they are true to themselves when they are alone. While others have merely isolated themselves because of the disturbing past events that has scarred their self-esteem. Some of which may have to do with a rough childhood, a traumatic event or bullying that has made them withdrew from the crowd.
Don’t rush! Wait before giving a name to your kinship:
When you think you’ve bonded well with your loner friend by successfully pulling them out of their shell, you might be disappointing yourself as this might not be the case. For loners, a few meetings cannot decide the longevity of your relationship. They like to crawl deep into one’s skin before branding or giving them tags or connotations that will define your existence in their life.
Since loners tend to be deep thinkers, they ponder for days before jumping into a conclusion. They have been alone for most parts of their life, so it doesn’t scare them but letting someone in their life is what makes them anxious. Mainly because they aren’t used to having people around and when they do, they do it with all their might.
What makes loner a “Lone Wolf”
- Loners are self-sufficient: Since they aren’t emotionally connected to people, they solely depend on themselves. Loners don’t necessarily seek human connection to pour grief into someone else’s cup. They are their own therapist, their own shoulder to lean on and their own saviour in distress.
- They feel much stronger when alone: Loners are confident beings, they don’t fear solitude. Rather they feel elated and in charge of their life and situation when alone. They are highly observant and are more alert in a solitary environment.
- Loners like connecting with souls and not egos: The biggest turn off for a loner is someone who is self-centered, egoistic and selfish to the point that they think the world revolves around them. They run away from people who have bigger egos and smaller hearts. As they find them unworthy of having a soulful connection or talk.
- Loners are sensitive beings: Most people who identify themselves as loners are sensitive. They care a lot about others and fear getting let down in the process of seeking friendship or love. This is why they create boundaries so they might not get hurt by someone they trust.
- They prefer quality over quantity. A loner can feel absolutely contented and happy having one but a true companion around, who they can cherish for a lifetime. They don’t like having too many friends who they will never see or talk in the long run.
- Introducing someone to their life is a big decision: Loners have a relatively slower coping mechanism than others. This is because they don’t like anybody easily and hardly find someone who they connect to on a deeper level. And if they do find someone and it doesn’t work well. They take a significant amount of time to get over it. Hence, solitude feels endearing to them than having temporary people around.
- Loners find it difficult to keep in touch and they lose people often: Since loners are unsocial, they find it hard to communicate on a daily basis. They don’t like to ping their pals often, as they think they might be disturbing them by being overly attached and friendly. Therefore, people forget them with the passing years or leave them, assuming they aren’t interested in maintaining the alliance.
- They are highly intuitive and they don’t like drama: Loners are good at reading people and sensing energies. They can easily read the mind of others by noticing how they interpret things and how they respond to situations. Therefore, they can easily make out when a person is lying, has ill-intentions or is consuming them for their own benefit.
- Meaningless robotic conversations don’t entice them: Loners avoid boring cliche talks and gossips. They dislike talking over phone, texting and engaging in short conversations that they find dull and boring. Loners don’t like draining their energy in something that they don’t find meaningful. However, they do enjoy human connections or interactions only if they are raw and heartfelt.
Let thy spirit be high in love. Namaste