How to Get over the Loss of Someone who is still Alive
No matter how cliche it may sound but whenever we’ve been hurt, cheated or mistreated by our loved ones, we console us by saying let it go, it was just a phase. But as overwhelming it may sound, a phase sometimes lasts more than a decade and the scars remain with you until your wound heals completely.
For those who lose their heart to someone, it comes like a storm. And to those who have lost their only friend, it comes like a blow on the back. To live without someone who was once a part of your life from dusk to dawn becomes a luggage too heavy to take a backseat.
Their talks, gestures, their only presence it becomes a drug to you. No matter how much hurt you are for being let down, it becomes hard to cut the thread of love. But in order to restore your mental peace, you need to take a step ahead to get over your hurtful past.
1. Reinvent Yourself:
Change is a part of life and sometimes you need to embrace it with all your might. Free yourself from the guilt of ending a relationship, friendship or losing a companion. If someone has been unkind to you and has hurt you in all possible ways, then it’s okay to let them go.
You are only responsible for your actions, so stop taking the blame for others. Not everybody has the strength to deal with the pain and to win over their insecurities. If you have conquered them, then re-invent yourself and let positivism fill in every inch of your soul.
2. Don’t allow anybody to dig your Past:
People are quick to judge and they will always look for gossip. Don’t answer every question that comes your way. Not every person needs to hear your part of the story, so let them think what they want to.
By doing this, you’ll never get out of the vicious circle. This will only make you revisit the haunting memories, again and again. So stop talking about your past and politely request others not to mix it with your present.
3. Be kind to Yourself:
The only thing that matters in life is how you well you emerge from the fire. If someone has been unkind to you, then it’s their character which has revealed itself. It does not mean that you aren’t worthy of love.
So be happy and proud of not losing your moral ground. Love yourself and cherish your existence if you don’t realise your worth then nobody else will.
4. Burn the Bridges:
Revisiting the same old place where you once experienced sadness will only scratch your wound. So stop following them on social media sites and keep yourself away from their life.
Staying in touch will only make you feel down in the dumps. Since you’ll remember the time, when once they were a part of your life. Refrain from holding on to them and unchain yourself even if it means losing someone you once cared for.
5. Shift your Focus:
Remember that when words fail to explain silence realises a person where they went wrong. Stay low key, humble and be contended with what you have now.
If there is someone who really deserves your attention it’s the people who stick with you when you are on the verge of breaking. Love and cherish their presence instead of wasting your time on someone who never valued you.
6. Learn something New:
Art is the best medicine that can help you cope with feelings of sadness and depression. Many people who experience the loss of a long-term friend, relationship or go through a heartbreak conceal themselves behind the four walls of their room. This is not only bad for your mental health but its sickening. Instead of killing your time on sulking use it to create something.
If you like doing an activity that makes you happy then do it until it fills the crack in your heart. Develop a hobby that keeps you entertained like dancing, singing, writing or learning how to play an instrument. This will not only keep you busy but will help in shunning the negative thoughts from your mind.
7. Connect with Yourself:
In this rat race of life, we don’t pay heed to our spiritual and mental well being. We are only busy in over-analysing situations and judging our moves. Instead of stressing out, give some time to yourself. Connect with your soul and cleanse your mind of all the unguarded thoughts.
Adopt mindful techniques like Yoga & Meditation to have a better understanding of life. This will not only help you to achieve inner peace but will align your Chakras as well. When you’ll be fully aware of your present situation, there will be no room left for the hurtful past to crawl in.
8. Stop Romanticising the Past:
Many people live in their past by thinking about it every now and then. If you have been mentally or physically abused, cheated and mistreated by someone you loved, then keeping them alive in your thoughts is the worst decision ever. By doing this you are not only feeding love and mercy to them but are also fiddling with your brain.
Since it will track all the memories that you had with them and will start knitting tales. All the romantic talks and good times spent together will wipe off the bad memories, persuading you to bring them back in your life. And this will be the biggest self-torture.
9. Vent it Out:
Sometimes keeping a lot to yourself can mess up with your mind. Try opening up to your friends or the person whom you trust the most. When you share your problem or pain with others, it makes it appear smaller and less important.
Suddenly the load on your chest drops off, making it feel a lot lighter inside. So unburden your heart by talking to your loved ones as it will help you in getting over it.
10. The ultimate Change is Time:
You cannot time travel in space and make things right. Neither you have the power to make someone feel sorry for their mistakes. So don’t be disheartened and trust the course of time. Like every deep cut heals with time similarly, every pain turns into a lesson or sometimes a blessing with time.
Try to evolve as a better, kind and loving human being to help others, who have walked on the same rough path. And erase negative thoughts from your mind because someone out there must be wondering- what it’s like to be with someone like you.
Let thy spirit be high in love! Namaste